Monday, February 29, 2016

anxiety, nutella, and mamma blues. or, happy leap day.

right now i'm eating a cold tortilla with nutella spread on it. being lazy and hungry is such a bad combination for me.

teddy's army crawl (still on his belly) has gotten advanced enough that in the time it takes me to log into my email,  he's made it across the living room, behind the couch, and is on a clear path to the kitchen or bathroom. i think he believes that if he makes it to the tub, i'll be forced to fill it with water and give him a nice long soak. he's always disappointed when i grab him before he reaches his next exciting destination (most likely a cluster of power cords, a sharp door corner, or the air vent that spews up dusty gusts in our loft).

i need to baby proof, but i'm not sure where to start. our apartment is basically three spaces full of dangerous things.

the other morning i had breakfast with a friend and teddy and i happened to be ready early which is bananas. but right after i texted her "we are leaving and it's five minutes early and neither of us have crap on us and we might even get there on time IS THIS REAL LIFE??!" teddy legitimately threw up all over both of us on our way down the stairs. i think being introduced to thicker baby food has his gag reflex all wacky.

i have such anxiety when it comes to politics lately. this election is scary.

the past few days some mamma blues have been showing up and i can't figure out why. any time i have a quiet moment i hear a little voice in my head that tells me that my life is pathetic, and i'm bad at everything i try to do, and i'll never be anything extraordinary despite all my best efforts. it tells me i'm ugly, foolish, and that i'll never be the person or the mother i aspire to be.

albertsons is doing this monopoly thing where you can win all sorts of prizes depending on how many zillions of dollars you spend, and i'm way more into it than i should be. ugh, albertsons, you tricky devil.

ryanair keeps sending me emails about how the flights between european countries are super cheap right now and i'm like, "i know, stop rubbing it in please."

it's teddy's first leap day. i'm determined to get us outside to celebrate it in someway. happy holiday. xo

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