Tuesday, October 11, 2016

being sub-par, and other things.

he's turned into such a mama's boy lately, and i love it. also- i feel like i've earned it- the first 13 months of his life, he openly preferred gideon to me (he'd be a grouch all day until dada came home from work, and then all of a sudden he was an angel). these days though, he'll drop his favorite toy for a snuggle with me. when i come home from work, he trots to me with a squeal and lovingly murmurs "mama" as he nuzzles himself into my neck.
i remember a friend of mine saying that motherhood gets better when they start giving back a little.
this is what she meant, and she was so right.

i've been collaborating with a dance company here in boise, and he's been tagging along with me to the rehearsals which is fun some of the time, and hard a lot of the time. he resents my attention being away from him, and will take my face with both of his small hands and force eye contact in the middle of a run. he's also gotten really good at rolling to the ground. the kid is graceful. i don't mean to be presumptuous but he's definitely the most talented human on the planet.
side note- he also really likes to eat rocks right now.

^^can you even handle this baby cow sweater??!

i feel spread too thin right now. i'm teaching at bsu, choreographing with idt, helping get our house move-in ready in the evenings, and changing diapers furiously in between. and i know i've got it easy. sometimes i really feel like i'm a horribly sub-par mother (/teacher/choreographer/diaper changer). it seems like every other mom i know gets more accomplished than i do. i'm determined to not accept any more side jobs until next year. i'm going crazy.

on a happier note, i'm falling in love with our home. when we first walked through it, i vaguely thought it had potential, but the more time i spend in it, and the more i watch it transform into what we envisioned, i realize it's actually my dream home. i can't thank the people who have helped us get this far with it enough. i've never loved a house like i love this one. it's small, and it's creaky, but it's doing it's best and i love it so much.

it's tuesday, and leaves are falling, and before we know it, the holidays are going to be here.
i hope you're staying warm.

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